In my apartment, conversations often get steered towards two things: the weird, or a wager. Once in a while, elements of the two get combined, and someone busts out, "So how much money would it take you to do *so and so*?" One of the most ridiculous of these happened a few short weeks ago. The topic of discussion somehow migrated towards manginas. If you don't know what a mangina is, watch Silence of the Lambs or Clerks 2, or run a google search (if you can't tell from the name, it is not safe for work). Now, don't ask me how the topic of manginas even came up, because I certainly couldn't tell you, but I'd imagine it had something to do with the aforementioned movies and the antics of the actors involved.
Someone soon asked, "So how much would it take for you to bust out a mangina on camera?" This was further clarified that the act would be emblazoned on a wide release feature film, or a Super Bowl half time show -- something a lot of people would see. Now you have to think about this before you answer: everyone's gonna know! Your friends, your family, any potential future girlfriends, employers, coworkers, and even strangers on the street; "That's the guy that busted out the mangina on YouTube!" It'll follow you for the rest of your life.
One of my apartment-mates said $50,000. One refused to give a price. I stated $3.5 million dollars, which my apartment-mates thought was proposterous. My reasoning is if I'm going to be walking down the street and people are going to point me out saying, "That's the guy that busted out the mangina!", their friend would quickly add, "but he did get $3.5 million dollars out of it,", prompting the original person to say, "true dat, true dat." I mean, no one does a mangina unless it leads to great prosperity. Ted Levine did one as Buffalo Bill in Silence of the Lambs, and that mangina propelled him to his current role as Capt. Stottlemeyer in 93 (and counting) episodes of the hit show Monk seventeen years later, as well as many other smaller roles in major motion pictures in between. Jay of 'Jay & Silent Bob' fame did one in Clerks 2, and... well let's be reasonable, he was probably high when he did it.
All of the above was trumped when my third apartment-mate (who will remain nameless) said, "Are you kidding me? I'd do it for two grand." Two grand? Two thousand dollars? Are you kidding me? You can barely buy a decent beater car for Two G's, and you're willing to be ribbed by your friends and accosted by random strangers for the rest of your life? You're not only bringing shame to yourself, but also your family. If you have kids, any accomplishment of theirs whether it be becoming a doctor or winning a Nobel Peace Prize, Pulitzer Prize, or Screen Actors Guild Award will be completly overshadowed by their subname given to them at birth: "Son/Daughter of the Guy that busted out the Mangina".
Someone soon asked, "So how much would it take for you to bust out a mangina on camera?" This was further clarified that the act would be emblazoned on a wide release feature film, or a Super Bowl half time show -- something a lot of people would see. Now you have to think about this before you answer: everyone's gonna know! Your friends, your family, any potential future girlfriends, employers, coworkers, and even strangers on the street; "That's the guy that busted out the mangina on YouTube!" It'll follow you for the rest of your life.
One of my apartment-mates said $50,000. One refused to give a price. I stated $3.5 million dollars, which my apartment-mates thought was proposterous. My reasoning is if I'm going to be walking down the street and people are going to point me out saying, "That's the guy that busted out the mangina!", their friend would quickly add, "but he did get $3.5 million dollars out of it,", prompting the original person to say, "true dat, true dat." I mean, no one does a mangina unless it leads to great prosperity. Ted Levine did one as Buffalo Bill in Silence of the Lambs, and that mangina propelled him to his current role as Capt. Stottlemeyer in 93 (and counting) episodes of the hit show Monk seventeen years later, as well as many other smaller roles in major motion pictures in between. Jay of 'Jay & Silent Bob' fame did one in Clerks 2, and... well let's be reasonable, he was probably high when he did it.
All of the above was trumped when my third apartment-mate (who will remain nameless) said, "Are you kidding me? I'd do it for two grand." Two grand? Two thousand dollars? Are you kidding me? You can barely buy a decent beater car for Two G's, and you're willing to be ribbed by your friends and accosted by random strangers for the rest of your life? You're not only bringing shame to yourself, but also your family. If you have kids, any accomplishment of theirs whether it be becoming a doctor or winning a Nobel Peace Prize, Pulitzer Prize, or Screen Actors Guild Award will be completly overshadowed by their subname given to them at birth: "Son/Daughter of the Guy that busted out the Mangina".
boys are weird.
ReplyDelete